The Soundtrack of my life

Thirteen Songs From the Soundtrack of TLC's life Okay, 20, but I tried to narrow it down, I really, really did

1. 1.Green, Green Grass of Home

My mother and I used to harmonize to this song. She played the organ and we would sing together. I remember looking up at her, as the sun shone through the window illuminating her face, and she glowed. She was larger than life. And she was happy, then. I must have been about 5. My mother is so very rarely happy, it is one of the treasured memories I have of her.

2. 2. Grandfather's Clock

My brother had a FIsher-Price clock when he was a baby. It was red, with yellow hands, and the face turned, revealing interesting pictures. The song it played has stuck with me for all of these years. I never knew what the song was called, but I hummed it all the time. Last year, JBug heard me and she said, "Hey, I didn't know you knew Grandfather's Clock!" I whirled on her, eyes wide: "WHAT did you say that song is?" So she showed me the lyrics, and sang it for me, and she was absolutely right. I told her a piece snapped into place in my world now that I know the name of that song. And yes, I still hum it.

3. 3. Luchenbach Texas

One of the first songs I ever owned. My father made a homemade tape for me with a home tape recorder. You could hear our parakeet, Happy, chirping in the background. I loved it. The memory of the song still makes me all fuzzy, and I haven't heard it in years.

4. 4. Hey Jude

I sang this song, over and over and over and over again. Kept coming back to it, even as a teenager. It wasn't even the Beatles' version, which makes it worse. It was from some kids' album. My brother still hates this song because of the way I played it into the ground.

5. 5. Juke Box Hero

   Foreigner, Baby! When I was a big, bad 8th grader, I would sit at my friend Carolyn's house and listen to this song, and Urgent, too. Carolyn had the best life, I thought. She was adopted, and her parents were older. Her mother was so mild-mannered, Carolyn just walked all over her. She got whatever she wanted, and never was told no. I was jealous. It was years before I understood the implications of that one...no boundaries, country kid. Not pretty.

6. 6. Rapper's Delight

I know, scary, I know Old Skool. But my friend and I had it memorized. We listened to it all over again. This is the record that started my love of rap music. Or at least, love of Old Skool. I don't do the gangsta rap where women are referred to as "garden implements". I don't like hate. I do like the catchy beats of rap, and always have. What can I say? I'm full of surprises.

7. 7. Working for the Weekend

Wasn't everybody? This was our anthem, while my girlfriends and I were getting ready to go out and cruise Main Street in our hometown. Yes, I know it is pathetic, but there was nothing to do where I grew up. Now there is even less, a few years after I grew up, they banned cruising at all.

8. 8. Come on Feel the Noize

Another party song from high school. We would play this one while we partied at Zmudowski State Beach. We called it Hidden Beach, because it was way off the beaten path and you had to park and walk over dunes. It was a great place to party, quiet, out-of-the-way and we never got caught. I only pray that my daughter has more sense than I did. (and I know I spelled the title wrong, I just don't like to write it the other way. It offends my mommiesh sensibilities.

9. 9. At This Moment

After a fight with a former flame, one of many, I was driving around trying to clear my head. It was late at night, and I was alone, and listening to the radio. This song came on and I started to sob. In an instant, it became clear, we couldn't stay together, I just didn't love him anymore. I knew I was going to break his heart, we had been together for three years, but it was time and I knew I wasn't going to ever feel the same. I can't explain it, because I am not the type of person to just walk away. But that song gave me a clarity of purpose like nothing else.

10. 10. Here I Go Again

I have always felt that I only ever had me to rely on. And through the years, as things would fall apart, and I would feel sorry for myself, I would come back to this song, as a theme song. "Though I keep searchin' for an answer, never seem to find what I'm lookin' for, oh Lord I pray you'll give me strength to carry on. Cause I know what it means to walk along the lonely street of dreams.." Yes, I have been there and done that. And at the risk of sounding self-indulgent (what else is this, anyway?) I close up when I get hurt, and end up wanting to do my own thing. This song reflects that, yet leaves some hope open, too.

11. 11. Time Warp

That's right, I am not a Rocky Horror Picture Show virgin. I know, I shock you. But I have seen it well over 100 times. And yes I know how to step to the ri-ii-ii-iiggght. Boy howdy. Some of my best times B.C. (before Christ) were with the gang from the Rocky. We used to watch at the Dream Theatre in Monterey. Sadly, it is gone now, some big developer wanted the land. Those were good times. Of course, I was terminally depressed, making stupid decisions and drinking way too much. But hey, you can't have everything.

12. 12. My Prerogative

And it, was, too. I went through a stage where I dressed in clothes that were too tight, went out with the wrong men and spent too much time in clubs. Color me Attitudinal. That's right, I was immature. I had just ended a long-term relationship and I was sowing my wild oats. Can you believe Bobby Brown wore that hair?

13. 13. Crazy Love

The Song with me and J. Just one of those things. We both love Van. And I loved his music before I got old, so shuddap. Else I'll hit you with my cane. Really great song. Brian Ferry does the song, too. Just about as well. The song must work, J and I are going on 17 years of marriage.

14. 14. Arms Wide Open

The song that was playing on the radio the day that I came out of the doctor's office with news that I was going to be a mother for the very first time. So many questions played through my mind. Would I be a good mother? Would J be a good dad? Will he be disappointed, especially since we said we would just have cats? (so funny to think about now) Another song that still makes me cry. I am so sad that Creed is gone. They showed a lot of promise.

15. 15. Don't Take the Girl

Newly post-partum, with my tiny baby girl on my chest, I heard this song. Guess what? Yep, I cried. I sang it to her almost every night, and even as she was growing up. (sometimes I still sing it to her, the big girl that she is. Shhh! Don't tell) And my son loves it, too. He calls it the Fishing Song, and he appreciates the lyrics. I love to sing it.

16. 16. Return to Pooh Corner

"Christopher Robin and I walked along, under branches lit up by the moon. Posing our questions to Owl and Eeyore as our days disappeared all too soon. But I've wondered much further away than I should, and I can't seem to find my way back to the wood...oh help me if you can, I 've gotta get back to the House at Pooh Corner by one..." What better song to sing to a child? This is one I still sing.

17. 17. Tears In Heaven

Between JBear and JBug, I lost a baby at 13 weeks. I have never felt such deep grief. It inhabited me, a foreign entity that was larger than I was. The only thing that helped was crying. I don't cry. Much. So this was very hard for me. I would listen to "Would you know my name if I saw you in Heaven..." and just sob. (You probably get the idea I cry a lot. I really don't) In fact, I probably should cry more often than I do.

18. 18. Unwell

Around about when my son was 2, I found out I was bipolar. I wasn't nuts, it wasn't me, it was actually a chemical thing. "I'm not crazy I'm just a little unwell, I know right now you can't tell, but stay a while and baby then you'll see.." I started medication and felt normal for the first time in my life. I have sense found that I am chemically normal when pregnant or breastfeeding. Otherwise, I cycle, though it isn't as prominent as some.

19. 19. I Don't Want To Miss A Thing

When my third child was born, JBean, she was 9 weeks early and spent a month in the NICU. This song became her theme song, because I realized, what if I had lost her? And, having had two other children, I know how fast the time flies. I really don't want to miss a thing! I would lie next to her in my bed, and just watch her sleep, and hum this song.

20. 20. Angel

Some wonder what this song is about. Sarah says it is about life on the road. I identify with the tortured artist in it, I guess. It just resonates in my core. Maybe it reminds me of what life was like without Christ...when I was seeking peace and something to quell the vague unrest in my soul. I still love the song though, because she gets it, "glorious sadness that brings me to my knees..." unless you have experienced it, it is hard to explain. But I have been there, and remember.

Get the Thursday Thirteen code here!

The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others comments. It’s easy, and fun! PLEASE if you auto-link, leave a comment. I want to know you were here! View More Thursday Thirteen Participants

T, who sets her life to music

Search Me: Thursday Thirteen, music

Technorati: music, Thursday Thirteen