Taking the Plunge (or Where I Would Go For the Weekend)

"Toilet Overflow!" Before the words were even out of my son's mouth, I was up and running, a mixture of adrenaline and speed. I rounded the corner, grabbed the plunger and averted disaster, again. We really need to get our pipes fixed. Homeownership isn't all that it is cracked up to be.

I sat back down and wiped my brow, trying not to hear the din that was my children playing. I need a break. A vacation. Yes, that would be wonderful. And that's when I saw the current topic for my webring, Crazy Hip Blog Mamas.

Where would I go and what would I do if I had a long weekend to myself? Some might think I would head to France, to replace the offending magnet that my husband so thoughtfully brought home for me. And I would, someday, love to see France. But... I would head to Tuscany. I fell madly in love with Tuscany through the book, Under the Tuscan Sun.

That book for me was a mental vacation. I opened the pages and could feel the warm sun beating down upon my head as I read. It was like stepping into a cool pool when the air is sweltering. I would sink down into it, and feel my body relax. Never has a book affected me that way. Now I want to see Tuscany.

Of course, my idea of a vacation is not having to do anything I don't want to do. This includes wiping little bottoms, tying tiny shoes, feeding picky little lemurs who only want to stare at their food and then back at me as though to say, "Are you crazy? I am not eating that!" Taking the children to Tuscany would be awful: "I don't want it, don't they have corn dogs?" There is not enough wine in the region to make a trip such as that enjoyable. So I would go by myself.

I would most likely stay in a nice hotel. There are some wonderful, 4 and 5 star artsy hotels in the area. I had links to them, but, naturally, they were left in a text file on my computer desktop and some child or other magicked them away. My own fault. Have I mentioned I need to get away?

The hotel would have high thread count sheets, and someone would come in and place a chocolate truffle on my pillow at bedtime. Of course, I would be there, and just ask her to leave the entire box. And it would be dark chocolate, naturally.

I would retire, with the light out, and no whining about how it was too dark. And no little feet would kick me in the ribs or steal my covers. No one would call me at 3 a.m. to inform me that they had to go to the bathroom.(and you had to involve me, because? You have forgotten where the bathroom in this house is?)

I would actually sleep through the night. I would awake on my own, with sunlight streaming through the large windows. No little hands would be grabbing at me, no shrill little voices would be demanding food. I would order room service for breakfast, take a shower (because there would be plenty of hot water...J, the Hot Water King, wouldn't be there to use it all) and just relax.

When my food came, I would eat leisurely, then head out for some sightseeing. I would stop and get an espresso at a sidewalk cafe, and just enjoy the local color. I would have no agenda. No one would make any demands on me, I would do what I wanted, as the spirit hit me.

Yes, that to me, would be a perfect get-away. I would arrive home rested, with a little bit of color from the sun. Naturally, I would have to buy some large Italiano Movie Star Sunglasses. When in Rome or Tuscany do as...well, you know the rest.

It would be a wonderful trip. But I don't think I would want to be gone longer than a few days.

The big comfy bed would start to feel lonely. I need those little feet there. And the cats that sleep on my bed at home are warm, and very comforting. Then of course, there is J. I would miss him, as well. And, just to be fair, I would bring him a nice magnet.

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