Thursday, July 31, 2008

The Lessons Of Friendship

Hi everyone! I'm Mrs. Tantrum, T asked me to help keep an eye on the place while she is at something called camp. I am worried about her as camp is a scary place from what I hear. I am also worried because she asked me to post for her. I mean she is on ALL TOP, and I am just ALL MEDIOCRE...has she lost her mind? I don't know, if you aren't certain, and aren't easily offended by a fierce potty mouth head over to my regular house Momma's Tantrum to see what I usually am up to. 

I met T over on Twitter. She has been a blessing in disguise on those days when Bacon is giving me convulsions because of his Asperger's. He is 4 and was just diagnosed last October. The whole thing of finally finding out "what was wrong" was a HUGE relief, as it meant that I was not a FAILURE as a parent. It did mean however re-learning EVERYTHING I thought I knew about parenting a child. 

T is AMAZING. (I know you all know that already, but I want to tell you again.) She helps me on the days I need someone to say, "I get it. It is hard, but it will get better! Remember to breathe." She also reminds me to eat my vegetables and have a yummy Frappuccino from Starbucks every now and then. (Not that I ever need a reminder to go to Starbucks, but I do need a reminder to mix it up now and then!)

I only have one with HFA, I cannot imagine the kind of days that T has with 3. The days when they are all losing it, and they are at home during lessons with no where for her to go. Those are the days I try to let her know that I too understand, and to let it out. Those are the days that I wish that there wasn't thousands of miles between us! Those days are the ones I wish she was a couple of doors down so I could take the kids and let them all lose it together. 

Try to remember whether you have a "neuro typical" kid, or a "non-neuro-typical" kid the most important lesson that I have learned from T, to be there to lift up your friends. Be there to lend a hand when they need it. Be sure to ask for help if YOU NEED it. Above all, be present and be sure to learn as you go. There is nothing wrong with asking for help, it is actually better to ask for help than to suffer through things alone. 

Mrs. T, who is guest posting for T who is alone in the wild w/teenagers!

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Trish said...

Great post - I'm glad you came over here so we could meet you. Thanks for the reminder to be there for our friends, even several years after starting the autism path, it is still easy to be over-focused on my son's needs.

Casdok said...

Yes ask for help when you need it. I found this hard to do in the early days.
And i dont know where i would be with out coffee!!!

Tina@ SendChocolateNow said...

aw, Mrs. T. you rock! Wish I could take you out for Starbucks and just give you a big ol' hug. ::sniff::

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