Friday, March 06, 2009

You can RSVP For My Funeral Here...

For four days now, I am pretty sure I have been dying. No one will tell me, but I know. It started with a high fever and body aches and has mushroomed into this cough that I am pretty sure is consumption. you can't fool me, I saw Moulin Rouge, and I know what she died from...she did a whole lot of coughing beforehand, too! So I am pretty sure that they are just humoring me, in this house. That's why they walk around on tiptoe and bow to my every whim. "Shhh! Yes, get her some orange juice, she won't be this way for long!" I know the way things work.

My youngest already has begun replacing me. When I oozed out of bed to help her into hers, something I have not been capable of doing for days, she started screeching at me:

"No, get away! I don't want you! You're a monster, you're evil! You're an alien! You're an imposter!"

Now I know I didn't look very much like myself, with flaccid, ill-kempt hair and hollow eyes, but I don't think I looked like a pod person! Of course, I am not 7. With autism. So what do I know? [this is where the picture, the one that shows me in my current state of disarray would go. I chose not to put it there. You are glad. Trust me.]

T, who hopes you will come to my funeral

3 sent chocolate:

The Four Week Vegan said...

You have it bad. Rest, my friend, rest. I hope no one else gets it. Would you prefer I wear black to your funeral or do you prefer festive colors to celebrate your life - I never know for sure now a days.

Anonymous said...

So sad you're dying before I get to even know you. Just found your blog. Lucky for you, since I obviously have consumption too and would have definately blamed you for passing it on if I could have.

Guess I'll have to go read your archived posts and hope for a recovery...

Feel better. The autism moms in the blog world need more laughs.

Anonymous said...

It is the Marburg.

You know it.

Dr Google told me.

You want flowers?

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