I was turning. I had the right of way. He whipped around me, and smacked my car. Not Happy. He took off.
T, who says he hit, and ran
Wednesday, June 18, 2008
Ahhh! Zombie Cat!
This is my cat, Perry. She is a bit over a year now, I guess... She is possessed, as this picture shows. We found her at a park, along with her brother, Winkle (called Twinkie because he is, well, a Twinkie). They had been abandoned and we nursed them with a a baby bottle, fed them by hand and taught them to use the litter box. I apparentently wasn't very good at this last thing, because she used to pee on stuff haphazardly. I was at my wits' end...then I changed litter and she completely changed her personality, goes in the box and is the Sweetest Cat Ever. All because World's Best Cat Litter? Wasn't...at least not to her.
Look, free stuff!
Cool Mom has a cool giveaway for kids with autism. Kibbles playhouse is a company that makes CDs with content like music for kids on the autism spectrum. Go over and enter, and tell her TLC sent you!
T, who loves to give exposure to autism causes, you know it!
Tuesday, June 17, 2008
The Itsy Bitsy...Holy Crow that's HUGE
I have mentioned before that I am not Supermom. But sometimes this message doesn't get into my brain. It especially Does Not Compute if it involves protecting one of my offspring. I am the Motherboard, after all. I make it all run.exe. (or start, if you are Mac user, like me) So, last night, when my son came in from playing outside to tell me there was a black widow hiding underneath a pipe by the corner of the house, instead of letting my husband, he of the Awesome Tech Support and Killer of Creepy Crawlies handle it, I grabbed a bottle of hair spray and went out the door to prove that I am more than just fantastically gorgeous, sexy and a bitchen writer. I am also: She Who Kills Spiders. I need a disclaimer here...I don't kill spiders. I catch them and put them outside, the poor things. But when it comes to venomous arachnids and children? All bets are off, and it WILL die.
The first thing I noticed was that the thing I was sent to dispatch was frickin' HUGE. She was as big as my thumb. I didn't take a picture, because, well, be honest, would you want to open my page and see that monstrosity staring back at you? No, me either! She clearly was quite settled where she was, and wasn't intent on relocation, especially not to the Big Web in the Sky, because when I sprayed her with the hairspray, I think she grinned at me, and retreated deeper into the crevice from whence she came. Thinking hair spray was going to freeze her was clearly wrong, she was probably in front of her Spider Mirror doing her hair! Part of the problem is that in an attempt to be more environmentally-friendly, we don't have Aqua Net or any of those aerosol-type sprays in this house. The only spray available was my daughter's year-old cheap Suave pump spray, left over from her theatre production. Probably not the best weapon against a Widow from Hell.
This was war.I retreated to the garage to plan my next move and to grab a can of poison. We don't usually have spray, but readers may remember that I have a phobia of the er. "r words." Large black insects that scare me so badly I cannot even write the word. We keep the spray just in case an errant bug cannot read the signs posted all around my house and haplessly wanders into my driveway and certain death. I retrieved the can, and came once again to meet my enemy. I raised the can, poised to spray her into oblivion. She merely stared at me with all eight of her eyes, and tossed her now-gorgeous spider-hair in defiance. I narrowed my eyes in answer and let loose. I sprayed the snot out of that spider! And still, she wouldn't die! She did a lot of spider dancing, so clearly it was affecting her. I considered turning the hose on her, but remembered years ago when I had then-babies and was trying to exterminate a black widow in the back yard: those mothers swim! I continued to spray her and she was either going into neuro-toxic convulsions or she was break dancing, I still don't know which. I decided to end it and show her once and for all who the true Survival of the Fittest would be. I pulled a sucker punch. I picked up a brick laying nearby and I smashed her flat. Dead.
I? Am a a bad-ass. Thank you very much. Now I have to go and curl up in a fetal position because that was a #$@& POISONOUS SPIDER! WHAT the hell was I thinking??
T, who won't be doing that again. Maybe
To blogher or not to blogher...
So, what am I going to do?
I have to make a decision soon! I would love to attend, and it isn't even the airfare or the conference price that is making me swallow hard. It is the cost of the room! Granted, I know the Westin St. Francis, or at least I do from the outside. It is gorgeous. When I was in San Francisco in May for LUGRadio (dh was representing Inkscape, I was giving moral support, and hey, why pass up a trip to San Fran, even if it is a serious "geek conference"??) we passed the St. Francis and I oohed and ahhed and said I wanted to stay there at some point. Of course we were staying at the Mosser, which is a funky little art hotel near the Metreon, best known for "better request a room with your own bathroom or you are gonna get to know some people realllly well."
Nothing in San Francisco is cheap. It just isn't. And even with the blogher special price, the room is insanely expensive. At least it is for me, we are on a single income, since I stay home and homeschool my children. And I know all the reasons it costs too much to go: it is a splurge. But see, I really want to go.
I know I am not an A-list blogger by any stretch. I am not in the big leagues. I get maybe 70-100 hits a day on this little blog. I have had it for about three years, but because of the fire that happened in October of 2007, I stopped writing for a while. It was just too painful. I regret not pushing through and continuing to blog. Some of the women I remember reading who had started just a bit before I did are All-Top, glittering celebs now. But I never started out to get famous. I don't write pay for postings here. I just write what I fancy and what is important to me. So, yeah, attending blogher might be the equivalent of being in the chess club and watching the cheerleaders from afar, but I want to give it a chance. I want to meet some of the women I tweet with. I want to talk about what makes us tick. I want to discuss how sometimes I can't sleep at night because I have a blog post in me that just has to come out. I want to see...does anyone else need to write in order to breathe? Is that strange? Am I insane? Or just mostly sane?
I have some real life friends who blog, but I don't know how serious they are about it. I am all about reading new blogs and "meeting" new writers and again, finding out how many share my passion and need to just let it all hang out. I want to know, how do they balance writing with the kids, who dammit, want to eat again? I just fed them three hours ago, what the heck? I want to know how women balance the fire in their bellies with the laundry, homeschooling, bathtime. And how do they find time to pursue their dream when every other thought is interrupted by "I'm telling!" and, "Momma!" and the only time they can write is after midnight once everyone is in bed?
I want to let my hair down and just be. I want to just hang out with women who understand and who don't look at me blankly and smile condescendingly when I start talking about why I am passionate about writing on the Internet. None of my friends in real life understand. They think it is a big time suck. And yes, it is. But it is also for me. It is something I do for me, and something I need and something that keeps me together, in so many ways. The community I have found while blogging is amazing. I am still trying to connect with bloggers in my area in the same way. It isn't easy. They're hard to find.
The Internet is a difficult thing. It is absolutely an equalizer, or at least it seems that way. So you can have a conversation, via Twitter, or through comments on a blog or even a message board, with someone and feel like you know them. But really, you don't. You know what they let you see. Take me, for instance. Because it is all about me, after all, it is my blog I might cover up the things I hate most about myself, and if all you ever do is read my blog, and never meet me in person, you would never even know. I might be loud probably, obnoxious sometimes, overbearing I hope not. And if I leave off those aspects of my character, how could you know? But see, if I hide from you, I am doing us both a disservice. Long before "transparency" was a buzz word in the blogging world, it has been my life's philosophy. If I pussyfoot around who I really am, how will I know if you ever really like me...for me? But I digress...
I admit it, I am scared. If I show up to blogher and meet some of the women that I read faithfully, will they even know who I am? Nothing is worse than expecting people to know who you are and they don't have a clue. I had this problem all through school, you know? I have a good memory for people, and remember them. I think because I remember what it was like to be left out in high school. And yes, it was a long time ago, a really long time ago! but I still remember. I think that is why I tend to talk to everyone, because that feeling of being left out is so awful I don't want anyone else to suffer it. Believe it or not, though, I am actually somewhat shy in new situations. But I make friends easily...or at least, on this end I do. Which brings me back to...
Should I go? And that is where am stuck right now. I have the window open to register and I just keep going back and forth. I know, Megan says we are welcome but.. What if...I get stuck hanging by myself all weekend (there are worse fates for a mom of three!) What if...they aren't my kind of people? (only they are, because I blog) What if...I feel out of place among the rock stars? (but really, aren't they just moms and women?) I don't know. I don't really do contests to drive traffic...(mostly because I don't really know how to go about that, I love the women who do) and I don't have any corporate guys anxious to talk to me about representing them... I just write. Just like all bloggers do: from the heart. And maybe at the end of the day, that is the greatest equalizer of them all.
T, who is still on the fence but better decide quickly
if you are going, will you give me a shout out in the comments?
Monday, June 16, 2008
Time for Change
Let's talk Old School vs. New School. I have been impressed with Barack Obama since day one. He just seems real to me. Today I read something that cemented my feelings. We all know about the floods in the Midwest. Hearing about them, John McCain issued a statement:
"Our thoughts and prayers go out to all those impacted by the flooding throughout the Midwest. Cindy and I would like to extend our sympathies to all those who have lost loved ones, and stand ready to help those in the Midwest to recover and rebuild."
That's all well and good, nice sentiment, right? In contrast: THIS is what Barack Obama did: 
He pulled on his boots and his jeans and he grabbed a shovel. He put his money where his mouth was. If you go to his site, the cover page is a plea for the victims of the flooding, and at his site you can donate to relief efforts. Imagine, a candidate who wants you to give to someone else besides him? When is the last time that happened?
For me, this really illustrates a Bible verse about faith and deeds:
What good is it, my brothers, if a man claims to have faith but has no deeds? Can such faith save him? Suppose a brother or sister is without clothes and daily food. If one of you says to him, "Go, I wish you well; keep warm and well fed," but does nothing about his physical needs, what good is it? In the same way, faith by itself, if it is not accompanied by action, is dead.
But someone will say, "You have faith; I have deeds." Show me your faith without deeds, and I will show you my faith by what I do.-James 2:14-18
What do you get with John McCain? More of the same: platitudes, old conservative platitudes. (and 100 years in Iraq). Time has come for the Old School to move aside. Obama is here, and you are about to be schooled in a whole new way.
Do you want change? It starts with you. Go GIVE SOME. The flood victims need your help. Send some money their way through the Red Cross. Tell them Barack sent you.
T, who put her money where her mouth is...how about you?
Sunday, June 15, 2008
Yes, but can he build me a house?
We are huge fans of Legos here. They are a staple of play, we have boxes of them, with an entire line of Indiana Jones Lego for purchase. JBear has the truck, the motorcycle and two temples...Christmas presents from grandparents and also bought with allowanceWe love us some Legos.
We've all mostly seen the Lego Church, and the desk, and the Lego reenactments on YouTube. There is a huge contigent out there on the Interwebs that play with Lego.
So when I came across a series of Lego pictures that recreated famous classic photos, I had to share. I hope you are as impressed by them as I was.
T, who cannot imagine having this kind of creativity
I can't HEAR you!
If I haven't updated it is because I have been dealing with Apple Tech Support. We bought JBug a MacBook for graduation, and literally 6DAYS later, the sound is wonky. There is no external sound coming out the speakers at all, but the headphones work. When the headphones were taken out, the computer thought that external speakers were working, we just weren't getting any sound. So I tried some stuff and checked more stuff online some stuff about internal input and that wasn't my problem exactly and then called tech support. So after hours online, PRU reset, PRAM reset and an reinstall OS w/ preserve settings, it is decided by me and tech support: return the thing. (after going through three techs) So frustrating. Today after church, I braved the Apple Store they are very busy on weekends I talked to a really nice Assistant Manager and they exchanged the computer. I love Apple again, I guess. Haven't opened the new one yet to see if everything is ok, but I see no reason why it wouldn't be. After all the tech fixes we tried, I figure I lost about 5 hours to this problem...and that is time I should have been blogging. if I haven't updated, at least now you know why, right?
T, who hates dealing with tech support
Friday, June 13, 2008
Happy Friday the 13th!
So today I---
...Warning, we interrupt this regularly scheduled post to bring you important news about the coming crisis:
And JoCo warns us about certain office cronies...
Zombies are everywhere! Look, they're in your House
The Army of Darkness is upon us! Oh, who will save us? Since this is a PG-13 blog, I decided to not post the really gory parts.
Look, they're all around us...even in the House of the Long Shadows (It had a good twist ending, which I loved.)
Quick, go here...learn how to defend yourself or you'll be food:
Zombie PracticeAnd to protect yourself from the coming Zombie Invasion, you need this shirt:
T, who hopes you can stay safe in the coming Zombie Invasion
Thursday, June 12, 2008
Oh No They Di' nt!
I generally stay out of the political blogging arena, because, let's face, it, so many say it so much more eloquently than I could. But when racism and sexism is so blatant, how does one stay silent? To say nothing, isn't that like tacit acceptance?
And yes, I know, it's Fox News. They say something offensive every day, that's nothing new. We're used to it. But maybe, that's the problem. We're used to it. Should we ever get used to one-sided news that is really not much more than opinion masquerading as Truth? It amazes and frightens me that so many continue to watch a channel that has been proven time and again to outright manufacture facts to suit the spin of the story they are "covering."
At what point do we say, "Enough?!" We know Fox News and their antics. We know the way they "accidentally" put the wrong party affiliation under a Senator who is in disgrace. We know they use every chance to discredit Democrats. But this goes beyond party lines. When a national news station starts using ghetto slang to describe the potential First Lady of the United States, how much lower can they go? To flash on screen: "Obama's Baby Mama" as Michelle Obama is speaking? Lower than I have come to expect, even from Fox News. What's next, playing Usher's "My Boo" in the background? I also find it interesting that Michelle Malkin is who they trot out: look, she's a minority and she agrees! Long Live the GOP! (never mind, just blame it on the liberals)
Make no mistake: if Michelle Obama was white, this racial slur never would have seen the light of day. If she was male, it wouldn't have been addressed. This isn't about partisanship. This is about bigotry. And the fact that despite the Million Man March, Martin's Luther King Jr.'s Dream and the first black Presidential Nominee ever, we still have a long way to go, baby.
T, who is just incensed
So Now That You Know What I Do With My Time
13 Reasons I like twitter Better Than facebook
1. 140 characters...short and sweet
2. When you add a friend, you don't need permission
3. you can have followers without having to follow them
4. it is just about instantaneous, so you can have conversations
5. NO applications to download!
6. no spam (you can always block a follower)
7. With twitpic, you can add pictures
8. has a great interface, and with free software like twhirl and Twitterrific, you can update from your desktop; sites like twittervision, twistori and Tweet Wheel give new perspectives
9. Don't have to hold your friends hostage to interact with the site
10. CONTESTS! pbloco, twittertowin, etc.
11. can update or check updates with your mobile phone
12. interesting links can be sent and clicked upon..can feed your blog URL through
13. Community, the best part.
T, who loves the social media thing
The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! Comments are LOVED! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others' comments. It’s easy, and fun! Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted!
Wednesday, June 11, 2008
The One Where I Get All Serious On You
So I was talking to my therapist today what you thought I stayed mostly sane by myself? Sorry to disappoint... and we were discussing feelings. I was telling her how I have a tendency to separate mine into "positive" and "negative" categories. You know the negative ones: those sloppy, in the way, spilled-milk ones that once they are out you have no idea what you are supposed to do with them? Anyway, I explained that, sure, I feel, but I more categorize and summarize than actually experience the entire emotion. I am really good at identifying what I am feeling and I can tell you all about it. I may even stick my toe in it. But to actually roll my pant legs up and put on my wellies and stomp through it? Not so good at that..
Don't get me wrong, I do feel. I feel great love for my kids, and I know they love me. I am absolutely and madly in love with my husband most of the time. I like warm fuzzies and cuddles and gratitude and comfort. I feel pride in a job well done. I cry at sappy commercials and the end of romantic comedy movies. But when it comes to the real life gut-wrenching anger or frustration or disappointment, I don't stew in that. It seems to be like snow in Southern California: remote and far away from me, where it belongs..
Lest you think I am some kind of flat-lined automaton, you can ask my kids, I get mad. Oh boy, do I get mad. Mama has a temper. And I would characterize myself as passionate; others have also described me thusly. I laugh and giggle and tease. I smile easily and have a good sense of humor. So I know I feel my emotions, especially the positive ones. But for the negative feelings, the ones that seem threatening and don't feel safe? I have to pull them in, dissect them, figure them out, and then experience them. By that point, there isn't much left. I apparently practice a lot of self-mastication: it is important to chew on those feelings, understand them and then move on. I am just too busy to soak in them at the moment, and I will trot them out another day. This works on a short-term basis, but as a long term plan, it falls short. Eventually, those emotions learn how to hide..now you see them now they're gone. Problem solved! But once I close the door, like cockroaches, the feelings come back out into the dark again. I know they're there, but I cannot reach them. I feel them nibbling on my sub-concious. .
I have asked myself Well, how did I get here? seriously, why I tend to temper negative emotions, and I realize it is a defense mechanism. I grew up in a family where only dad could hold the anger. Don't get me wrong, I was plenty angry. I just couldn't show it. Also, I found out when I was twenty-five that I am bipolar, and over the years, I have learned to keep myself on an even keel. I regulate my phases pretty well. I am fortunate that I have only ever had one major manic episode. Everything else ends up in the easy to manage hypomania cycle. When you have two kids with autism who are not very good self-regulators, you learn to be very, very good at it. It wouldn't do for all of us to throw a tantrum, now would it?.
It scares me to think what would happen if it comes out in one huge slimy pustule? I wonder if I would ever stop the emotion, or if it would just swoop me away for good? I tend to feel emotions strongly when I don't filter them first. It can be difficult to control them. Emotions have a way of lying. They can say life isn't worth living. They can say no one understands you. They can say, why don't you just go back to bed and not bother getting dressed today? And they can whisper, wouldn't it be easier if you'd never married or had kids? I don't have time to fight those phantoms, so I just refuse to even entertain them. They can say your family would be better off without you and you know there is a rubber room out there with your name on it, right? I am rather hard on myself, I guess. If I get depressed, I mentally kick my butt to get me going again. I am not mean about it, but goodness, there is always something to be thankful about, so get to it! Stop feeling sorry and move on, already. This works pretty well..
But sometimes, sometimes, I am just weary. It might be that I got up on the wrong side of the bed. It could be PMS, but whatever it is, it isn't quite Right. And it 
T, who is sorry to be such a downer, but sometimes,like Starbucks, writing is therapy
Tuesday, June 10, 2008
This Has Never Happened Here...I Plead the Fifth
T, who refuses to answer on the grounds it may incriminate me
Technorati:
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Savage_Chickens,
I Admit it, I Stole It...
The Wishing Well of Creativity was a little dry today, so you get a stolen meme.
1. Favorite Person - hands down, my husband. He is my best friend and partner in mischief
2. Favorite Food - Starbucks mochas (they are too a food group!)
3. Quirks about you - I cannot for the life of me use a thick-bowled spoon. We have both thin and thick and I will wash a thin-bowled spoon before I will use a thick-bowled one. I unplug all appliances after use except computers, tv and clock radios (but that is due to my paranoia after the fire
4. How would the person who loves you most describe you in ten words or less? crazy, sexy, passionate, opinionated, talented, brilliant, moody, bobcat pretzel(see Two Weeks Notice and you will understand)
5. Any regrets in life? - I wish I had finished college. I wish I had blogged through the fire instead of taken a break for a year. When I came back, I noticed bloggers that I had been blogging with getting noticed. I feel like, "Wow, that could have been me! A book deal? Sure, don't mind if I do!" Instead, I am limping along.
6. Favorite charity/cause - autism advocacy and La Leche League
7. Favorite Blog - that's like asking me to pick my favorite book. I just can't do it. There are SO many good blogs out there...that's probably why I have over 660 unread items in my Google Reader
8. Something you can't get enough of? - erm, "marital congress." I know, it's my husband's curse.
9. Worst job you ever had? - I worked as a bartender in a beer/wine bar in my 20's. I came home at 3 a.m. and reeked of smoke. I got fired because the owner told me I was "too good" to work there and to go back to school.
10. What job would you pay NOT to have? - anything that involved poop or heights or exterminating anything.
11. If you could be a fly on the wall anywhere, where would it be? - isn't that what twitter is??
12****Breaking News*** - I just ate ice cream and am now watching soap operas! I have the most exciting life, ever!
13. Guilty pleasure - A big bowl of Ice cream WITH Hershey's Syrup. Barring that, Grande Decaf Starbucks mocha w/ chocolate whipped cream
14. Got any confessions? - My children were raised by wolves. Rabid ones.
15. If you had $1000 to spend on YOURSELF, what would you spend it on? - I don't really want anything and $1000 is a lot to spend at one time. I have to have braces, and that is over 1K, but it isn't fun. Ok, I would go to BlogHer,aka Mommy Summer Camp... assuming my schedule was clear,because it isn't now. I have both youth summer camp and a homeschool convention to attend that month.
16. Favorite thing about your house? - The fact that it is standing again? Seriously, after the fire, we did everything brand new. I love it. It is designed in the Craftsman style, and I adore the whole house. There isn't a white wall in my home, I love color, but it has to be harmonious.
17. Least favorite thing: The weeds in the backyard as tall as my children
18. One thing you are bad at - moderation. filtering noise. (thank goodness for headphones)
more if you click below
19. If you could change one thing about your current circumstances what would it be? - I honestly cannot think of anything. I was going to say not to have kids with autism, but they are who they are and I cannot imagine them any differently..ah I got it...I would have more time to write
20. Who would you like to meet someday? - I can't think of anyone. How boring is that? I am not a huge fangirl.
21. What makes you feel sexy? - getting all dolled up, dressing for my husband. Tight jeans, heels and a slim-fitting shirt. And my favorite music.
22. Who is your real life hero? - I Me. I'm my own hero. I think I am pretty awesome for what I deal with on a daily basis..
23. What is the hardest part of your job? - Being on call, 24-7. I'm the go-to person. I'm the Mama.
24. When are you most relaxed? - After the kid are in bed, it is quiet, I have my Starbucks mocha (few times a week) and can just sit and vege,
25. What stresses you out? - Two people trying to talk to me at the same time. Three sends me over the edge. Loud noises, like lawn mowers or weed eaters. Being CONSTANTLY INTERRUPTED when I am trying to get something done.
26. What can you NOT live without? - besides my family? I am not going to say my computer, because it isn't going to happen that I will have to live without it... my iPod and my car dock.
27. Do you agree or disagree with the recent article that reported that blogs are authored by narcissists? - See Question #22? no seriously. if that were the case, there are an awful lot of narcissists out there..because a LOT of people blog. So, I disagree.
28. Why do you blog? - I blog because it allows me to release, and others can profit from my pain. I love to make you laugh, cry and just share. I love the Community of bloggers, and I love being a part of it.
T, who promises something more substantial tomorrow, or even later tonight
Technorati:
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THIS is Ridiculous!
How is this possible??
 | 83 As a 1930s wife, I am |
Must have been the "marital congress" thing...
Ok, something is wonky. I took it again, with more negative answers and got a HIGHER score? 85?! Must be because I am good to my husband. But..I don't want to get up for breakfast, I serve in my pajamas, I do the stocking feet thing. I wear red nail polish. I buy too much from "tin cans and the delicatessen"...so why am I scoring so high?
T, who IS a feminist and I have no idea how I scored so well
Monday, June 09, 2008
Yes, I'm the Butt of the Joke
He is nine now. This happened when he was four.
It wasn't something he said, not this time. We were standing in line at The Evil Hamburger place, hereafter known as McDonalds. I was hungry and tired, and had three kids in tow who were also hungry and tired. The line was moving at a snail's pace, the cashier wasn't moving at all. We waited. My one year old was in the sling, squirmy and awake. She wanted my attention. My 8 year old was trying to be on her best behavior, but she had grown weary of the hold up. She wanted to eat. Now. Even if it was McDonalds.
My son has autism. He has no mouth filter. He makes rash decisions. Bored and with nothing to do, he struck up a conversation with the man in front of us. I eyed the stranger warily. The conversation started the way they always did: "Do you like Indiana Jones? I have seen Raiders of the Lost Ark, it's a good movie, did you like it?" The man agreed, it was a good movie and that Indy was cool and yes, his hat was cool and yes, son's hat was cool, too. I breathed a little, so far, there hadn't been anything out of ordinary. That was about to change.
My son was diagnosed with high-functioning autism, but not until the end of Kindergarten. At this point, he was just "quirky." The line moved up, just a little. Still two people were in front of me. Was this ever going to end? We needed Chicken McNuggets! Some fairly loud and boisterous construction workers joined the line, which was now fairly long. We waited some more as the guy in front of us was ordering.
I tend to start up conversations in line with random strangers. It seems to be the curse of my semi-extroverted personality. I say semi-extroverted because when I am 
home alone, I revel in my aloneness. But when I am out, I will actually talk to other people. The introverts in my house don't understand it. Luckily, my son is an absolute extrovert and likes to talk to people. People don''t always like to listen, however. The burly construction guy asked how old my kids were, and here it comes the requisite, "You certainly have your hands full," along with my stock answer: "Yes, and my heart is full as well." About this time, my son decided to horn in on the conversation. Being polite, Mr. Big & Burly Construction Guy turrned and asked him his name. I have no idea what possessed my son. To this day, he still doesn't know.
We are standing there, in the middle of a food establishment as loosely defined as McDonalds is food and my son, the fruit of
my loins, turned around, pulled his pants down and mooned the entire line of customers! I stood frozen in shock while the construction crew guffawed loudly. That was when, the voice of sanity spoke up. It was my daughter, wise beyond her years. "He is SO mortifying!" said she. Why yes. Yes, he is.
T, who remembers it well
The One Where I Convince You I Am Not Old
Have you heard the awful rumors? No? Good. Because hear me now, I am absolutely too young to have a high school student. Do you hear me? is this thing on?? Sigh. I cannot be old. I wear cool shoes! I listen to hip music. I wear semi-fashionable clothes. well I don't have a link, you'll have to take my word for it I have bitchen hair. I cannot be old, ok? I am a youth leader for the jr high (soon to be high schoolers) at church. They like me. I like loud music and cookies. I am not old. Repeat it with me.
Tonight was our promotion celebration for our homeschool. There are 41 families in our group. JBug was the only 8th grade graduate. There were two Seniors graduating from high school, though. Not even going to think about that. We all went on stage as a family and JBear along with JBean received their promotion certificates. Then JBug came on stage and was given her certificate of graduation. She is an excellent student, and studies Logic (second year), Latin (second year) Algebra, Ancient History, Greek literature (we are of the Classical bent, more or less) Life Science and Intermediate Band: she plays the clarinet. In her spare time, she is teaching herself the piano. She is very self-motivated and I rarely have to remind her to get on task. I was asked to say a few words, and this is what I said:
JBug, wow, we are in a completely different place in our lives this year, huh? In the last two years since you have been homeschooling, your father and I have watched you blossom from a tentative child to a self-confident young woman. While it doesn't seem to be your nature to jump into an activity with both feet (you will never be an early adopter), you are trying things more easily than you have in the past, and sticking with them. You are no longer stuck in the Perfection trap...you are realizing it is enough sometimes just to do something because you enjoy it. And even if you don't. I have watched you step up and do what needs to be done. You are an invaluable help around our house, and you are usually uncomplaining.
I have watched your relationship with the Lord grow as you discover who He is to you, personally. I have watched you step up in ministry as you find the areas where you are gifted. You have a reputation for service, whatever needs to be done. And for wisdom. We all learn from you.
I have watched you grow in your friendships. Our joke is that you didn't find your peer group until you started homeschooling...so much for no socialization with homeschoolers, right?
And most importantly, I have watched our relationship grow. You talk to me, and I talk to you. I love that aspect most of all. It has been my privilege to watch you grow, and I am absolutely thrilled that I get to share so closely in your journey to womanhood.
Congratulations, JBug. You are absolutely ready for high school.
)
*On Tuesday, I will honor my younger kids, I really am not ignoring them. But this is JBug's moment
T, who absolutely is not not not old (and is very proud of her daughter)
Saturday, June 07, 2008
"I'll Have the Quesadilla"
Today I was listening to Rock Star by Nickelback in the car, and it is one those songs that you need to crank way up and sing at the top of your lungs. but only with no kids in the car, because the lyrics are sometimes eyebrow-raising, PG-13. So I am singing this song, about credit cards with no limits and the mile-high club and drug dealers on speed-dial, and I realize...while the song is awesome, the message is horrible! What does it say about me that I listen to this? If you haven't heard it, here it is...but warning, it is PG, might not want to have littles around when you listen.
I was trying to decide..does Nickelback really want to be this type of Rock Star, or are they making a Statement about the excesses of the rock musician lifestyle?
And do I have to analyze every cotton-pickin' area of my life? Can't music just be music? Why do I take life so seriously, man, it's just rock n' roll. Except, it's not. It's life, and I remember what my 8th grade Sunday School teacher used to tell us: GIGO: Garbage In, Garbage Out. How does listening to this supposedly "harmless" song affect me and my attitude and my moral compass? And maybe it doesn't affect me, since I am an adult and my values are set...but what about kids who listen?
Then I decided, maybe I need to think on this. And if this is true, how much of my music would I have to change in order to reflect the values I want for my kids? When they were younger, I was very careful about what I exposed them to, but now that they are older, I am not as worried about it. Maybe that is misguided. Maybe now is when I have to watch what they are exposed to and listen to just uplifting music.
Don't get me wrong, I listen to Contemporary Christian music, and I love it. But there are times I just need something different. AND I find so much truth in music lyrics from the likes of Sarah MacLachlan, Van Morrision and even Panic at the Disco! But should all truth be allowed to reign in a child's mind? More to think about...
BUT for now, we are just going to go with silly stuff, ok? you can relax now, all the deep stuff is over for now On to the fun stuff...
I thought it would be fun to check out misheard lyrics for the song, just to lighten up a bit. This is what I found:
Misheard lyrics: live in little tour busses driving fifteen cars
Correct lyrics: Live in hilltop houses driving fifteen cars
Misheard lyric: And a big black chair with a bathroom in it.
Correct lyric: And a big black jet with a bedroom in it
Misheart lyric: Gonna cut a lot of grass so I can eat my meals for free
Correct lyric: Sign a couple autographs so I can eat my meals for free
In all seriousness, I wouldn't want to be a rock star. Too. Much. Pressure. I prefer the Internet, where I can be anonymous.
What silly lyrics have you misheard? Shout it out in comments.
T, who always mishears lyrics and sometimes just changes them to be funnier
Glad the Lightsabers Weren't A Mistake
Tonight at dinner, JBean dropped her eating utensil on the ground. I tried to hand her mine, but she thought it was too big. So I handed it to JBug, and had her trade her little one with her sister. Yes, it's Parenting by Laziness...your point? In exasperation, over her whines of protest I said,
"Oh, just use the fork, JBean!"
From the living room I hear JBear:
"Use the FORK, JBEAN. Use the forrrrk!"
Thanks for that, Obi-Wan. Glad to know the Star Wars Lego game for the DS was not in vain.
T, who lives in either a George Lucas or Steven Spielberg movie,depending upon the day
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